10 Months is a Long Time

Exactly 10 months ago I updated my blog talking about getting back on track... It is saddening and embarrassing to know I did NOT follow through. Here I stand heavier than last year and back to my old eating habits. I would blame life and the drastic changes involved but there is no excuse. I would only be deceiving myself if I said I couldn't handle a lifestyle change.

I did not plan on starting up again, in fact I have been very happy eating out and stuffing my face; what I have not been happy with is my 3x blouses and size 22 pants. There I put myself out there and I am ashamed of what I have become. I know I can't continue this way not only have I been overwhelmed with self loathe; I know my health is probably in the gutter.  I need to change, one day at a time, one baby step at a time. I can't predict what my future holds but I know that it shouldn't matter. I need to keep moving towards being a better me.

I didn't plan on getting back on track this morning but something clicked,  changed,  and made me want to stop making excuses and start making changes.  Here's to motivation and inspiration.

Restart

WOW... time sure as heck flies by. Things started getting extra bumpy earlier this year and I just never got back into the habit of being a better me. It's crazy and sad how easily things slip away when not making an effort. I've gained 5 pounds back and have completely stopped going to the gym. Shame on me.

Today was my first official day to get back on track. I woke up had a protein shake and I went on a walk with my son. It was nice being out getting some fresh air and spending time with him. :)

For lunch I had two eggs, three thin slices of queso fresco, and a slice of avocado. Dinner will be chicken and salad. I have to reevaluate my plan and set different goals. I cannot believe this year is almost coming to an end. I'm 3 months shy of a year since I started this blog. It makes me extremely sad to know that I've only regressed instead of progressed since then.

New goals: lose 10 pounds by January and 5 more by February 21st.
I cannot let another year slip on by. I have big plans for my life and I have to be  healthy to accomplish them. More on that later. :)

"A year from now you will wish you had started today." - Karen Lamb

I fell off the bandwagon.

It's been a long two months or at least that's what I tell myself to make it better. Going to they gym is difficult when your toddler gets sick very easily. Working out is difficult when you've slacked off for two weeks. Then those two weeks turn into four and then into eight.

I'm ready to start again. Thankfully I haven't gained any weight back. Still sitting at 260. Not good but at least not terrible. I'm making it my goal to lose at least 20 pounds by the time mid-July comes around. That would put me at 240 which is what I weighed before I had my son.

I'm going to try my hardest to get there. Getting into the habit of going to the gym is going to be really difficult for me but I will do it. I WILL DO IT.

No excuses.

Habits

Going to the gym and eating better have slowly become habits. When I first started earlier this month it took every ounce of strenght I had to get myself to the gym. I no longer question it; I plan for it. Eating has definitely been more challenging.  What's helped a lot is just keeping the bad food out of the house. If I don't have the temptation then I can't indulge.

My family is going along for the ride as well. It's a great thing!! Everyone is eating more vegetables and no sugary treats! I'm 2 pounds shy of my first 'short term goal' and that gives me the motivation I need to keep fighting for this. Hoping that by next week I will officially be at 260!

Up & Down

These past two weeks have been full of ups and downs. I've had set backs. Days when I've given up and given into my old habits. Days when I don't go to the gym... but I've managed to stick to it! So far despite the bumps down the road I've managed to lose 5 pounds. And that motivates me!

When I first started "working out"  (although I can't really call it that! Going twice a week for about 40 minutes isn't much.) I would reach my heart rate as soon as I got on the machines. The elliptical, which  is the one I use the most, would wear me out within the first 5 minutes. I couldn't go any faster than 3.2 miles! Now a few months down I HAVE to run my butt off at 6.0+  mph to reach my heart rate. It makes me feel wonderful!

I cannot wait to weigh myself again in a few weeks. When I reach 260 I've decided to treat myself to a new hair color!! Very exciting! (To me anyway lol)

I wish I was thinner!

"I wish I was thinner!"  "I wish I could fit into size 7 jeans!"  "I wish I could be attractive like celebrities!"

These , among others, are things that ran through my mind as I gained weight this past year. Celebrities are constantly being pictured coming out of the gym. It's when I realized they work their butts off to look the way they do. I'm sure some of them get a little help here and there (and to be honest I would too if I could afford it!) but for the most part they work to keep their bodies looking good.

I still want these things and I haven't stopped thinking about them; but instead of sitting around wishing to be fit I've actually started working for it.  When was the last time anyone lost any weight sitting around and eating like a fatty? 

I saw this quote the other day and it's one of the quotes I think about whenever I feel like giving up:

"You don't always get what you wish for. You get what you work for."

And it's true. I gained this weight all by myself by making these bad choices; I have to work to get rid of them.